How to Show Her You Care This Valentine’s Day
What are some great ways you can make your wife feel loved and special on Valentine’s Day? Remember, the soul of your wife (i.e.: her inner drives, desires and needs) is shaped uniquely and majestically. As her husband, God has not only called you to provide for her life needs but also to cherish, nurture, cultivate and care for her souls. Clearly, the things which your wife most needs from you don’t flow from your job title, a pay check, big birthday gifts or a mere kiss good-bye on the way out the door; they flow from her soul.
This is what the Bible talks about when it instructs the men in the first century about how to care for their wives. This was the Bible’s challenge to them:
“Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church — a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ’s love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They’re really doing themselves a favor — since they’re already ‘one’ in marriage.
No one abuses his own body, does he? No, he feeds and pampers it. That’s how Christ treats us, the church, since we are part of his body. And this is why a man leaves father and mother and cherishes his wife. No longer two, they become ‘one flesh.’ This is a huge mystery, and I don’t pretend to understand it all. What is clearest to me is the way Christ treats the church. And this provides a good picture of how each husband is to treat his wife, loving himself in loving her, and how each wife is to honor her husband.”
(Eph. 5:22-33, The Message – emphasis mine)
In the New International Version of this same Bible passage, Paul makes it clear exactly the way in which God calls a man to invest himself into the life, heart and soul of his wife. The actions verbs he uses are dynamic and specific . . .
“LOVING/CHERISHING” HER . . .
“GIVING YOURSELF TO” HER . . .
“CLEANSING” HER SOUL . . .
“PRESENTING” HER RADIANT (ie: vibrant, whole and alive within) . . .
“FEEDING” HER . . .
“CARING FOR” HER . . .
“BONDING TO” HER, SOUL TO SOUL . . .
So, how can you do some of these things for your wife this Valentine’s? Here are 7 practical and simple ways you can SHOW HER YOU CARE:
- Write some romantic one-liners on Post-It notes and place them in surprisingly strategic places through-out your home (ie: inside the washing machine lid, in a kitchen cabinet, on the bathroom mirror, lingerie drawer, her purse, etc.).
- Give her a call in the middle of the day and tell her, “I’m just checking in to see how your day is going?”
- When you see her looking overwhelmed, ask her if she could use a hug. Give her a lingering and supportive one and, while you’re holding her, offer up a simple prayer to God on her behalf.
- At the beginning of the week, before flying out the door, ask your wife, “Honey, what are some things I could do to help make your week a better one or a bit easier for you?” Be sure to follow through on whatever you commit to.
- Write a short poem or just a paragraph or two about what she means to you. It doesn’t have to sound like Whittier or Longfellow to please her, as long as you’re being you. Print it out and frame it for her.
- When you notice her general motivation waning, ask her to describe how she’s doingemotionally in the words of a weather forecast (ie: sunny, partly cloudy, thunderstorms, etc.)
- Plan a “Passionate Getaway” with your wife. Block out a few days on yourcalendar, make sure they are days she has clear, then plan a romantic week-end or a couple ofdays together somewhere. Many hotels offer affordable weekend packages. Keep it a surprise and spring it on her. Initiate it all yourself — pick the place, book the reservations, line-up the babysitter, etc. One way to announce it to her is to give her a card and a gift box with a new negligee inside.
For more on how to enrich and empower your marriage and family life read the Crosby’s new book, The Will of a Man & The Way of a Woman or visit them at teaminglife.com